Lessons learnt while at NMMU

Guest blogger ... NMMU Psychology alumnus Curwyn Mapaling

The Top Seven Things I Wish I Had Known Earlier in Life

1. Set a goal and don’t stop working on it until you reach it. 

You have within you the intrinsic potential to achieve all that you set out to do. Nothing is impossible as long as one works hard to achieve it. I was unsuccessful the first time I applied for two of the awards that I received in 2014, namely the Abe Bailey Travel Bursary and the Golden Key Community Service Scholarship Award. This happened despite having worked on my CV, motivational letters and going for mock interviews. The experience at the time was both heartbreaking and disappointing, but just because it didn’t work out the way I wanted it too, doesn’t mean it didn’t work out exactly how it was intended to. I had the choice then to just give up or try again. I tried again and applied what I learned from the process. When I was later awarded both I was delighted that I didn’t give up on these dreams when I was unsuccessful the first time. This also motivated me to apply for the Mandela Rhodes Scholarship which I was awarded later that year. What are some of the dreams that you might have given up on? What is stopping you from trying again?

2. Get off your Umtarara! 

Get involved in something...anything...but just do something. Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try. Do not conform to the culture of learned helplessness whereby people wait around doing nothing, waiting for things to be handed to them. 

3. Find a Mentor 

Someone, anyone who believes in you and is willing to walk the road with you as you try to achieve your dreams. No one does it alone. Not someone who will just be there, but someone who will be honest with you and tell you the hard truths that you need to hear in order to be your best. Talk to that person, visit with that person, don't be afraid to ask them the things you need to know or are confused about or afraid of. 

4. Don't be offended or over sensitive when people give you honest advice.

It isn't always easy to hear criticism, but just because someone challenges you doesn't mean they are against you, they are trying to help you be better!

5. Use your talents, whatever they are

I’ve been involved with certain groups and organisations and the reason my involvements worked for me was because they were things I enjoyed and loved to be a part of. It is easy to be committed to something you enjoy doing because it doesn't feel like work. 

6. Giving back to those in your community gives so much more back to you

A little involvement changes everything. All our little bits of goodness and kindness put together can overwhelm the world with much needed positivity and progression. 

7. There are many different types of leaders

Not all leaders are the loud person in front of a crowd. Personally, I struggled to see how I could have any type of leadership impact as that just wasn't me. I then learned about servant leadership. A servant leader doesn’t focus on being the best in the world but rather being the best for the world. I would like to encourage you all to explore the many different types of leadership and to find the one that works for you and is best suited for who you are. Find a leadership style that allows you to remain true to who you are and what you believe in. 

In closing, a quote from GT Ferreira, “Everything will be ok in the end. If it’s not ok, it’s not the end yet.” 

• Curwyn is currently doing his Masters in Clinical Psychology and Community Counselling at Stellenbosch University.  He completed his Bachelor of Psychology (Counselling) at NMMU last year.